Betrayed, But Not Forsaken

   In 1999, after thirteen years of marriage to a man I met at Moody Bible Institute, my husband decided he believed in God but that was all.  He didn’t want to follow Jesus Christ anymore, and after telling me he was convinced he was going to die before reaching the age of 36, he proceeded to have an affair, get tattoos and body piercings, get a bartender’s license, stay out all night at bars drinking, watch porn, and dye his hair blonde.
   I was devastated, even though I had seen our marriage deteriorating for several months.  I initially believed he was a true Christ-follower but it was no longer evident in his life. I had given my heart to Jesus at the age of 8, grew up in a Christian home, graduated from Moody Bible Institute, and married a guy who I believed loved Jesus as I did.  But his love for Jesus wasn’t there, although mine wasn’t where it is today (God always has a purpose in our trials).
   As I look back on the three years of separation before the divorce was finalized (I finally initiated the divorce proceedings, after significant counseling from Christian counselors, because he wouldn’t do it, even though he was the one who left), I remember that I never asked God why this was happening. It was the most painful time in my life, but I knew God was with me even in the deepest loneliness. I was betrayed by the man I had been married to for thirteen years, but I had not ...

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