Haunted by Anger, Nightmares of Vietnam, Alcohol; Then Saved by Grace!

    It all began after I returned from Vietnam. I attribute my survival there to a grandmother that prayed for me daily, though at the time I had rejected whatever knowledge I’d received about God via my parochial schooling. I was depressed, drinking, and getting into fights.  My anger issues were uncontrollable. I had attempted suicide at this point, but was miraculously saved by God intervening with a thought I had not solicited, at the very moment I was going to pull the trigger.  I then calmly unloaded the gun and went to bed.  In spite of this, I refused to acknowledge Him and His power.  I attended college and began to flourish in a career that kept me on the road or away from my young family every week.  High stress, high rewards, in a time when “party hearty” was the mantra.

   A lack of accountability and little time at home led me into a life of deceit and a feeling of entitlement, and this eventually led to a divorce.  Afterwards I was on a slide toward further degradation and self-abuse.  During this time frame, I met my current wife and we’ve been together now for 34 years.  However, although I told myself things were better, and now had two sons to raise (in addition to the three children from my first marriage that were living out of state with their mother) I was still haunted by my angry outbursts, nightmares of Vietnam and was drinking more than ever.  And he ...

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