What Does It Take To Have a Successful Marriage?

   Nobody goes into marriage thinking, “everything is great now, but just wait until that first conflict and I am out of here.” Nobody says in their vows, “I will only love you when it is easy and everything is going my way in the relationship.” Nobody gets married thinking, “this won’t last and we are just going to get divorced anyway.” Yet, we have all heard that 40-50% of all first time marriages will end in divorce. Around 60% of all married couples report being unhappy in their marriage.

   Since the 1970s, marriage has been on a steady decline, over 50%. This would be very discouraging and negative rather than hopeful and positive if we only focused on the numbers. 

   There is so much that can be said about what it takes to have a lasting marriage and a great deal of research that can back it up.  Often experts talk about couples who work hard at healthy communication (Listening and talking), conflict resolution, laughing together, forgiving faults and being kind/compassionate to one another as being hallmarks to longevity in a marriage.  

   I want to focus our attention on the concept of premarital counseling.  It seems to be the most over-looked, under-appreciated and under-valued part of the marriage planning process. Couples, or their families, will invest thousands of dollars on wedding ceremony and reception costs wit ...